Kareoke will never be a sober sport
I'm timing the release of my poops to the sound of the machine gun from the video game he's playing in the living room.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
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