Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
Randomize
