Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
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