I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
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