Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
