Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Randomize