We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
All the doctor said was why
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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