now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Randomize
