Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
i would one night stand the shit outta him
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Randomize
