I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
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