I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
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