ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
Randomize
