cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
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