yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
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