i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
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