I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
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