It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
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