She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize