How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
Randomize
