just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
