I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
Randomize
