She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
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