U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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