Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
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