You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
Randomize
