her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
Randomize
