He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
Randomize