we have officially mastered the walk of shame
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
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