whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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