She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
Randomize
