Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
Randomize
