pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
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