just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
