So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
Randomize
