just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
Randomize
