I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
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