I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize
