I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
