We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
We're too hungover to prance.
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
Randomize
