At least make sure they are 18
Why
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
Randomize