I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
Randomize
