she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
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