Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
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