he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize