Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
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