What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
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