Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
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