No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Randomize