You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
I'm texting you from across the beer pong table to tell you that the drunk chick you brought over needs to disappear. like now.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
Randomize