Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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