All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
